That lesbian wedding disco playlist in full – Disc Two.

(Disc One is here.)

1. I’m In The Mood For Dancing – The Nolans.

As I found out when handing the mix CDs over to Maureen (or is it Doreen?) earlier in the week, the disco dancing will actually be interspersed with an eclectic variety of live musical entertainment, provided by various friends of the brides. (The brides have a lot of musical friends. That’s musical, not “musical”. Well, that as well. Oh, you know what I’m saying.)

It is therefore fairly unlikely that every track on every CD will get played – thus putting paid to the worst of my Control Freak notions (see previous post). In which case, it might be an idea to skip straight to the start of Disc Two, where the ever-fragrant Nolan sisters are already “in the mood” for dancing. With an invitation like that, who could refuse?

2. 9 To 5 – Dolly Parton.

This song has loomed large over Nottingham gay nightlife for the past two or three years, by means of a rather cheap and nasty dance remix which speeds dear old Dolly up to positively Smurf-esque levels. This, needless to say, is the original. Absolute guaranteed floor-filler.

3. If I Had A Hammer – Trini Lopez.

A little indulgence, as I used to play this out a lot at my Stop Clause 28 benefit nights, usually nestling somewhere in the vicinity of “La Bamba” and “Hot Hot Hot”.

4. Reet Petite – Jackie Wilson.

One of the wedding guests had a Top 50 hit in the UK singles charts with a cover of this, as credited to a couple of dancing pigs called Pinky and Perky. He did the music, the speeded-up voices, everything. He doesn’t talk about it much, though. Hi, Paul!

5. You Never Can Tell – Chuck Berry.

“It was a teenage wedding, and the old folks wished them well… “C’est la vie”, say the old folks, it goes to show you never can tell.”

I’m getting visions of lines of wise old grandmas in the corner, nodding and smiling and waggling their fingers at the happy couple. Ee, Doris, who’d have thought it forty years ago? That we should have lived to see the day!

6. Wake Me Up Before You Go Go – Wham!

The last time I put a mix CD together for a disco – which turned out to be a good 50% teenage lesbians, but that’s another story – this was the biggest floor-filler. Mine not to question why, but I’m hoping for a repeat success.

7. Love Shack – The B-52’s.

Personally, I’ve always find this more than a little irritating. But then, one or two key tracks aside, I’ve always found The B-52’s a little irritating. (Wacky! and Kooky! don’t really do it for me.) Still, no wedding disco complete without, etc etc. I’m mixing out of this at the false ending, straight into…

8. Hey Ya! – Outkast.

…which makes for a very effective follow-on. This is the last of the run of ultra-uptempo tracks, as we slide into…

9. Take Your Mama – Scissor Sisters.

Something has just occurred to me. Of the four contemporary tunes thus far, three (Darkness, Timberlake, Scissors) have recently been performed on the telly by Shayne from X-Factor. How bizarre. I have no ready explanation for this.

10. Love The One You’re With – Isley Brothers.

Time for a brief respite from the cheese. This might clear the floor – but then again, Will Young covered it on his second album, so the recognition factor may still be high. Works well rhythmically after the Scissors.

11. Justified And Ancient – The KLF featuring Tammy Wynette.

Another special request from the brides, who know it simply as “Moo Moo Land”.

12. A Little Respect – Erasure.

Hurrah, it’s the Late 1980s Pop section! Which continues with…

13. Take On Me – A-ha.
14. Open Your Heart – Madonna.
15. I Think We’re Alone Now – Tiffany.

Cripes, is that the time? To coin a phrase, I shouldn’t be sitting here and talking to you like this. Not when there are garments to be folded. So let’s quickly whizz through the rest of Disc Two, which is entirely devoted to late 1970s disco. If all goes well, then tracks 18 through 20 should induce a particuarly Loved-up Communal Sisterhood vibe…

16. Knock On Wood – Amii Stewart.
17. Blame It On The Boogie – The Jacksons.
18. Ain’t No Stoppin’ Us Now – McFadden & Whitehead.
19. We Are Family – Sister Sledge.
20. Love Train – The O’Jays.
21. Don’t Leave Me This Way – Thelma Houston.
22. I Will Survive – Gloria Gaynor.
23. Feel The Need In Me – Detroit Emeralds.

To be continued – but only if I get a break from the garment-folding.

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