Singles of the year: #50

50. Everybody Deserves To Be F***ed – Sex In Dallas

So you’re at the bar, and this French dude asks your name, buys you a gin and tonic, seems cool, fancies himself, but then who are you to judge, but then he’s straight into this coked-up monologue, or whatever else he’s on, who can say, about how it’s your time, it’s everybody’s time, it’s your turn, ‘cos we’re living in a time where, you know, everybody needs to be free, so just f***ing free yourself yeah, ‘cos everybody deserves to be f***ed, and there’s this blaring techno music all around you, with a buzzing punk-rock guitar coming out of somewhere, you don’t know where, and the lights, and the gin, and the French dude going on and on and on, and you’re smiling and nodding and finishing his sentences, and giving him a cigarette, and he’s off again, pointing at the dancefloor, all those people, all alone, he wants it, she wants it, you and i should, you know, everybody deserves to be, to be, to be f***ed?

With charmers like him, who needs Rohypnol.

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