(posted by Anna)
Preparation.
Spend three hours getting ready. Wear the first thing you tried on. Swear there’s no special reason for dressing up, even though you look like a cross between first date, kerbcrawling, and engagment party.
Execution
Make sure to execute anyone that turns you down.
No, hang on. Don’t. Do that, you’ll never get married. (*gasp*)
Smile. Flatter. Thrust Cleavage. Smile.
Have wit, smut and grit all in the same sentence.
Smile.
Cleavage.
Drink spirits and mixers, or bottled concoctions, or shandy.
Don’t drink anything straight, they don’t like it.
Drink steadily, giggle.
Resolution
Announce your desire but inability to go home alone.
or
Announce the existence of several bottles of wine in your fridge.
or
Announce your desire to have sexual relations with everyone in the room
or
As ‘token girl’;
Go out, enjoy, flirt, drink, desire, lose desire of, watch, drink, think, sleep.
That would seem, it would seem, to be us.
troubled diva 